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A couple just moved into hotel. And the hotel clerk asks the man after helping him with his luggage. - Anything else? - NO, thanks, - Maybe, your wife needs something? - Oh, yeah. Thank you for your reminder. Do you sell greeting cards? I don't even know how this is a joke as I'm just very confused of it. I'm not exactly sure what it is referring to
Daisy was sitting in a bar when a stranger walked up to her and asked, "If you woke up in the woods and scratched your butt and felt Vaseline, would you tell anyone?" "Hell no!" she said. The stranger then asked, "If you felt further into your crack and pulled out a used condom, would you tell anyone? "Daisy said, "Of course not." "Wanna go camping?" Of course, this
My 4-year-old sister saw a picture in a zoo book and said, "Look at this! It's a frickin' elephant!" I took a deep breath, then asked "What did you call it?" "It's a frickin' elephant! It says so on the picture!" And so, it does, "A f r I c a n Elephant" Wow! This is very clever, it is like a joke and not a joke at the
Daisy walks into a pharmacy (chemist) and asks if they sell extra-large condoms. The chemist replies, "Yes they are just over there." She thanks him and stands there near them. "Would you like a packet," the chemist asks. Daisy replies, "No that's fine. I will just wait until somebody purchases them!" Maybe I should buy daisy some condoms, LOL. Next time I see a girl standing by the condoms
I asked Siri how to delete emails and it responded, "ask Hillary." Lol, this is actually funny because Hillary was caught with emails that were deleted. If you are confused about what Hillary, it is Hillary Clinton, President Bill Clinton's Wife. As Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were fighting each other against the presidential campaign. Hillary deleted her emails to hide, which it is a suspicious move by her,
I was at Hallmark and overheard a woman ask an employee where the cheapest wedding cards are because "they won't be together long." Lol, this is actually a good one and I will remember it next time I look through gift cards. Sometimes, I wonder just how silly some of them are, but I guess none of them really matter. Nice Joke After reading this joke, I was thinking
Frog parking only ... all others will be toad... Lol, this is actually a good one and nice joke. Ever wonder what is the difference between frog and toad? Well, it sure is kind of hard to tell them apart if you know nothing about them. But as I like to say one is a swimmer and the other not really. Frogs come usually moisty and wet body material
Why is it called "ice" instead of "hard water?" This actually makes sense in a way. It's almost hard to believe that it's a joke as so much true it seems. Well, my only guess is that hard water may refer to many different types of water. As there are variety of water types, often hard can refer to their environment. Whereas ice is another word of its own
The best part of having a penis is sharing it with those who don't have one. Well, now I'm thinking what would be the not best part of having one, LOL. Just another stupid joke, but I guess it could make sense in a way. Nowadays, you might spot a girl looking human, yet next thing you know it has one. The world is turning and twisting in so
If nobody comes from the future to stop you, how bad can the decision really be? Well, it depends just who is responsible for the decision being made. If it is somebody like the president, then just a big impact is what it can take. If it is from an average person, maybe it just won't matter or even make a difference. It all depends to who is responsible
About that time to clock out, go home, and slip into a nice comfy argument. What I'm really thinking here is that a man is about to go home and get in an argument with his wife. For some reason, getting in arguments with women is pretty popular. I'm not exactly sure why, but it's as if they are just made to argue with. Almost like they are preparing
"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." - 2 Corinthians 4:7-9 NIV This kind of reminds me of the movie National Treasure by Nicolas Cage which it came out in 2004.
"But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a
"Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses." - 1 Timothy 6:12 ESV Of all things this reminds me of is the fight between Armenia and Turks back over 100 years ago. If you guys are unaware there was a Genocide the Turks did to
"But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ." - 2 Corinthians 11:3 NIV As this is mentioning Eve, in my mind I'm thinking a bit of selfishness. Which, this is reminding of the War that is taking place now with Ukraine and Russia. If you are unaware of this
"Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity." - 1 Timothy 4:12 ESV I was talking to couple of young girls the other day who were in their early 20's. Anyway, they kept saying that they are young and kept mentioning their young age. This only made me wonder that these girls are
"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you." - Jean-Paul Sartre This is why you need confidence to step up in life regardless of what's been done to you. Talk about freedom, as Donald Trump has been trying to build the wall in the border of USA and Mexico, many people are against it. After thinking about it, I think it is a good idea is
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” - Genesis 2:18 NIV Well, what can I say that this is telling me that his bringing a girl for a man. Only one thing that goes in my mind as we are in the month of June which is the Pride Month. Pride Month is the
A blonde reported for her university final examination, which consists of "yes/no" type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Yes for Heads and No for Tails. Within half an hour she is all
A blonde buys two horses and she can't tell them apart. So, she asks the farmer next door what to do. He says to cut one of their tails off. So, she does. But then the other horse's tail gets caught in a bush and rips off. So, she can't tell them apart again. She asks the farmer for advice a second time. He tells her to cut one
"Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment but has passed from death to life." - John 5:24 ESV As it says passed from death to life which tells me there is a life after we leave planet Earth. Which means when we die here on Earth, we go to life if
"Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation. - If you continue in your faith, established and firm, and do not move from the hope held out in the gospel. This is the gospel that
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." - John 3:16 Okay, I'm getting a bit confused reactions here and you may just not have ever thought about it. Well, we all kind of think that Earth is hell or there is no love for the Earth. Meaning, we shouldn't love Earth or
A waitress walks up to one of her tables in a New York City restaurant and notices that the three Japanese businessmen seated there are furiously masturbating. She says, "What the hell do you guys think you are doing?" One of the Japanese men says, "We are all berry hungry." The waitress says, "So how is whacking off in this restaurant going to help that situation?" One of the
Women's magazine: Page 46 "Accept yourself as you are." Page 48 "How to lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks." Page 50 "Recipe for the best chocolate cake ever." I don't even know how this is a joke as it is just so true. However, it is one of those things that you just to think about. I often look at the cover of magazines and it says things like
